the scatterbox organized

Re-post: 13 Things Your Waiter Won't Tell You

Yeah, I know it's awfully lazy of me to just slap up a re-post of someone else's post, but I couldn't resist.  The mister and I both have some years racked up in ye olde food service industry, especially him, and we can verify that all of these are true.  And if you or someone you know has ever eaten in a restaurant, live it, love it, and pass it on.

*****

13 Things Your Waiter Won't Tell You

by Reader's Digest Magazine, June 23, 2009

1. Avoid eating out on holidays and Saturday nights. The sheer volume of customers guarantees that most kitchens will be pushed beyond their ability to produce a high-quality dish.

2. There are almost never any sick days in the restaurant business. A busboy with a kid to support isn't going to stay home and miss out on $100 because he's got strep throat. And these are the people handling your food.

3. When customers' dissatisfaction devolves into personal attacks, adulterating food or drink is a convenient way for servers to exact covert vengeance. Some waiters can and do spit in people's food.

4. Never say "I'm friends with the owner." Restaurant owners don't have friends. This marks you as a clueless poseur the moment you walk in the door.

5. Treat others as you want to be treated. (Yes, people need to be reminded of this.)

6. Don't snap your fingers to get our attention. Remember, we have shears that cut through bone in the kitchen.

7. Don't order meals that aren't on the menu. You're forcing the chef to cook something he doesn't make on a regular basis. If he makes the same entrée 10,000 times a month, the odds are good that the dish will be a home run every time.

8. Splitting entrées is okay, but don't ask for water, lemon, and sugar so you can make your own lemonade. What's next, grapes so you can press your own wine?

9. If you find a waiter you like, always ask to be seated in his or her section. Tell all your friends so they'll start asking for that server as well. You've just made that waiter look indispensable to the owner. The server will be grateful and take good care of you.

10. If you can't afford to leave a tip, you can't afford to eat in the restaurant. Servers could be giving 20 to 40 percent to the busboys, bartenders, maître d', or hostess.

11. Always examine the check. Sometimes large parties are unaware that a gratuity has been added to the bill, so they tip on top of it. Waiters "facilitate" this error. It's dishonest, it's wrong-and I did it all the time.

12. If you want to hang out, that's fine. But increase the tip to make up for money the server would have made if he or she had had another seating at that table.

13. Never, ever come in 15 minutes before closing time. The cooks are tired and will cook your dinner right away. So while you're chitchatting over salads, your entrées will be languishing under the heat lamp while the dishwasher is spraying industrial-strength, carcinogenic cleaning solvents in their immediate vicinity.

From Waiter Rant: Thanks for the Tip-Confessions of a Cynical Waiter by The Waiter (Ecco/HarperCollins)

Doodle Love: Brigette B.

I don't really remember how I stumbled upon Miss Brigette...  Perhaps it coming across an item of hers on Etsy, but I'm glad I did.  Noseying on over to her blog, I unearthed a treasure trove of doodle love.  I so love the retro vibe, from the character's faces...

 

Tattooed Lady

to the surreal color choices she uses...

Pink Trees

...the one that totally reminds me of my friend Abby...

 

Librarian Bookended

...and especially those quirky-awesome coyotes.

Even the simple ones that remind me of my childhood.

Snow Day

(all artwork copyright Brigette B.)

I seriously can't stop looking at her work sometimes.  I really need to buy something and have the hardest time narrowing it down to the first piece.

Be sure to check out this post, as well, where you can see and read about a campaign she worked on for Swarovski.  So friggin' cute.

Thanks for making me smile, B!

The Lost Year

I had heard the phrase before to describe different situations for different people.  Basically, for one reason or another, the person had circumstances arise in their lives where time, in these cases, a literal year or two, had gone by most unremarkably.  It seems that I have experienced the same.

This past weekend marks a year since a very dear friend of mine was killed in a car accident at the age of 32.  It happened a week after I stopped playing roller derby, one of many reasons being that I was going to attempt to tackle some other interests of mine.  After Liz died, it had the opposite effect, almost like a subconscious excuse to let things fall by the wayside.  It wasn't that it had plunged me into a pit of mass depression; I was in a cloudy funk for a couple months, yes, but it wasn't entirely new...  Beginning with my father in 2005, she was the fifth relative or friend I had lost in three years, but it seems that it knocked me far back enough into a hole to make it difficult to climb out.  Aside from a couple trips we had taken, the past calendar year was the most unproductive, uneventful ever for me, both mentally and physically.  Affecting attitude, motivation, and creativity, you could have erased the time from my bio and no one would be the wiser.

Luckily, I began to wake up from it the past couple months.  I read some great, inspiring books, I've begun to exercise again for the first time in a year, and really thought about getting my interests back on track, all of which are very important to my productivity and my relationships with those around me.  A co-worker of mine retired a couple weeks ago, and as a going away gift, she received a book filled with well-wishes from patrons of ours.  In skimming through it, there were many quotes echoing essentially the same sentiment: "Now you can enjoy your life and do all the things you've wanted!"

Really?

Is that what it's all about?  Putting life, itself, on hold until more than half of it is over and you probably don't even have the strength, energy, or desire to do the things you dreamt about twenty, thirty, or forty years earlier?

No thank you.

Maybe I'm selfish, but depriving yourself of what truly motivates and excites you, and maybe even what could be your calling, seems like shortchanging yourself.  About seven years back, I started to stop daydreaming about new experiences and started doing them.  My father's passing pushed it a little further.  Liz's did, too, but it's not been until now for that particular push to take effect.  Better late than never, as they say.  I recently had a conversation with another friend about how she really wanted to start pursuing her passion.  She told me about the quote she has posted in her home that continually asks what you would do if you knew you could not fail.  I have a beloved Ben & Jerry's bumper sticker on my car that reads, "If it's not fun, why do it?"  Both are mantras that I've taken to heart in the past and am working on implementing again.  Granted, most people are faced with obstacles that may keep them from pursuing what they desire, be it kids, finances, location, etc.  But when you really break it down, is it something you can learn from books at the library?  Are there skills you can obtain by bartering services with someone?  Can you get your kids involved in the journey with you?  I bet if people took the time to really see how they can take baby steps toward their goal, that it can be attainable.  It may not happen in a month, or a year, or even ten, but if you want it bad enough, time won't matter.  That is what I remind myself.  Time won't matter... unless you think you have all the time in the world to accomplish it some other day.  Like Liz, not everyone gets that chance.  So I have no more excuses and I am no longer complacent with my status quo.  The bad habits, the procrastination, and the self-doubt have no more room here.  If I am to achieve the things I want, which will in turn make me a better person for those around me, it can't have that room, and it can't wait.  So I'm beginning again, every day, little by little, to make sure that this next year is, most definitely, found. 

Now ask yourself:  What would YOU do if you knew you could not fail?  And why are you not doing it?

Happy Earth Day!

 

I won't go into too much of a dialogue about the significance of today here, since everyone knows anyway, and especially since I blogged about greenery not very long ago.  As the weather warms up, the skies are blue, and the birds are singing, I hope everyone takes this day to remember what they love about this season and this planet and what they can do to keep the good and change the not-so-good.  If you're new to participating in the eco-movement, there are tons of resources on the interwebs, from using CFLs to buildling an entire house with green in mind.  Even Target recently had little $1 pocket-size Dummy guides on how to do your part, which I promptly picked up for the moms. 

Starting today is also the opening of Disney's new film, Earth, which has all the visual awesomeness that Discovery Channel's Planet Earth series did, because they worked on it, too.  Plus, it's narrated by James Earl Jones, which is another added bonus.  To top things off, Disney has pledged to plant a tree for every ticket purchased during opening week, primarily for the endangered Brazilian rainforests.  So if you want to go, make now the time and get a two-fer!  I do hope that it's not too heavy on the eco-sadness moments, though, because that stuff just shreds my ticker.  But I understand.

 

Yesterday, I also found out about the upcoming theatrical release of Food, Inc. (June 12th!) which has me very excited.  This movie collaborated with Eric Schlosser of Fast Food Nation fame, as well as Michael Pollan, author of The Omnivore's Dilemma, which I mentioned in my last post.  I've not yet read Nation, but the trailer looks like it covers the bulk of what Omnivore had to say, including an interview with the amazing farmer Joel Salatin of Polyface Farm, who is a bright, shiny star in the eat-well movement (Hey!  He's on the front page of today's USA Today Life section!).  The documentary trailer, featured HERE, is a bit more engaging than the theatrical one, and really lets you see more of what it's all about.  If Omnivore has you intrigued but you aren't the biggest reader, this movie should bring it all home for you just as nicely.

 

So, go out and enjoy the day, little chicklets, even if it's just for a little walk.  Mother Nature kicks ass.  :)

***

Side note:  I'm also commercially pumped for a few upcoming popcorn flicks, like Wolverine (some nice-looking testosterone in that one...), Angels and Demons (new Dan Brown book in September!), and, of course, Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince (holy visuals!)...  weeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!

Good Eats

If you live pretty much anywhere east of the Mississippi, chances are that you had, as we did, a freaking gorgeous Saturday.  Aside from the pollen count flying off the charts, we couldn't have had a more awesome spring day here in ye olde Cackalack del Norte.  Bluey-blue sky, perfect temps, low-to-no-humidity (yet).  I also have a bit of bio-weirdness when it comes to temps in that I have about a 5-degree range of comfort: 75-80F.  Below starts to get a wee bit of a chill for me, and above gets too steamy.  I blame it on my coma-esque blood pressure levels.  But yesterday was perfection.  In my five states of living in this half of the country thus far, I have to say that this area, and really the southeast in general, is one of the best places in the states to experience spring. One of the main reasons is the awesome display of flora, which, here, takes the form of artsy tulips, crazy-blooming white, pink, and fuschia azaleas, masses of lavender wisteria, and my favorite, the dogwood trees.  They look like little white butterflies suspended in mid-air.  And all of this is everywhere.  Ever watch the Masters tournament?  That's what I'm talkin' about.

 

(image from tangledwing.wordpress.com)

Soon, the next phase will kick in to include the hydrangeas and magnolia trees in all their glory, too.  Absolute beautifulness.

To take advantage of the wonderful weather and the fact that we currently have a Jeep at our disposal, we took a morning drive over to the Carrboro Farmers' Market.  The Carrboro market really focuses on growers interested in pursuing more eco-friendly, sustainable practices.  Upon the suggestion of a friend, I recently read The Omnivore's Dilemma by Michael Pollan, which instantly was added to my shelf of best books ever read.  It's basis is enlightening the reader to numerous ills of our society that can be traced to the industrial farming methods and processed foods that our culture has come to unfortunately embrace.  At the same time, it highlights the benefits of farming and eating food that is locally and sustainably grown, and in season.  I could write an entire post on this book, but I'll spare you my glorification.  All I can say is that this book has garnered incredible praise and should be required reading for everyone.  It may just change your life, and for some people, it may just save it.  His follow-up book, In Defense of Food, is an extension of this concept and is on my to-read list next.  Its focus: "Eat food.  Not too much.  Mostly plants."  I can't wait.

The market offers all kinds of wonderful sights and smells that make me want to drop a truckload of cash at every stall, which, unfortunately, I cannot do.  So we try to get some good dinner fixins for the week, like grass-fed beef, organic lettuce, fresh herbs and veggies, or, depending on schedules, just get little nibbles here and there.  This visit was a nibble visit, which is equally satisfying.  This week's catch:

 

Juicy, uber-fragrant strawberries, a jewel-toned anemone flowers, hearty tomatoes, cracked-wheat artisan bread, rosemary-lavender goat milk soap (that I can't stop sniffing the poo out of), and a hunk of mozzarella to finish off my caprese salads.  In the back is Mike's new t-shirt, featuring the original market logo from 30 years ago.  Not pictured was the slice of moist strawberry bread, sun-warmed cinnamon roll, and locally roasted fair-trade coffee that we downed for our breakfast while strolling the stalls.  Such a great morning.

To continue the yummy theme of the day, we got home and Mike whipped up scratch-made biscuits and sausage gravy using his great-grandmother's biscuit cutter.  Can we say tasty?  Looove the sea salt and cracked pepper on top. 

 

For dinner, it was chicken skewers with Mediterranean seasoning, sweet potato fries, and wild rice, finished off with wonderfully rich, homemade vanilla ice cream (May I recommend Ben & Jerry's recipe book?) topped with some of those fresh strawberries.

A very good day, indeed.

***

For those of you toodling around in the land of Twitter who have food fetishes of any kind, or are maybe a bit of a trivia geek like myself, here are some great follows, all curated by the same person:

• Foodimentary (various food facts)
• Cheesementary (mmm... cheese)
• Vegimentary (It's National Garlic Day!)
• Javamentary (coffee)
• Vinomentary (wine)
• Greenimentary (eco-tips and facts)
• FoodimentaryGuy (the curator's hodge-podge page)

Good stuff to entertain your brain.  Have a great week!

 

Doodle Love: Kei Acedera

I discovered Kei Acedera a few weeks ago and she instantly became a favorite artist of mine.  Based in Toronto (What is it with Toronto?  I feel like I'm doing theme week on Wheel of Fortune...), Kei is a freelance artist who also produces work for Imaginism Studios, and is currently working on the new, very exciting, upcoming Alice in Wonderland film by Tim Burton (featuring Johnny Depp and an amazing supporting cast).

Here are some of my faves:

 

A Little Break, 2009

This one really has great elements of retro illustration that I love.  The fluid lines are fabulous, as is the way the colors in the grass reflect the colors of the girl's clothing.

 

Little Red and Wolf, 2008

I know we all know the story, but doesn't this drawing make you want to read the version that goes with this?

 

Good Bunny, 2008

It's carnivally.  The end.  Not to mention, who doesn't want to give a huge carrot to a huge bunny?

 

Enoki Forest Song, 2008

Raise, raise the lantern high,
Darkened riverbanks roll by,
The small skiff drifts, the band plays on
And the fireflies dance along
To the enoki mushroom forest song.

LOVE the detail. The shadows of the creatures in the back... The little frog playing maracas!!  Stop it.

To find more great art from Kei (and to purchase prints and originals!), check out her Imaginism link, or run a search to see other online galleries.

***

And hey, kids... It's Wednesday, April 1st... Don't forget our date tonight!

p.s.

If you've followed my sage advice and checked out the Enter the Haggis links from yesterday's post, I have a little plan to let you in on.  Assuming that you liked what you heard (pssht... of course you did!) and you want to get your ears a Gutter Anthems copy of their very own, may I suggest a purchase date and time of this Wednesday, April 1st at 9:00pm EST from iTunes?  No April Fool's joke here: Gutter Anthems has been hovering around the top of the world music chart on iTunes for about a week now, and there is a mission in place to nudge them up to the #1 spot.  We feel that by doing this collectively, it would be just the right recipe to make it happen. 

So... Whaddya say?  See you there Wednesday night!

Haggis with a Side of Doughnuts

 

I recently had the good fortune to head up to Canada for a night to enjoy some of my favorite ear candy.  Enter the Haggis is a band based in Toronto, Ontario that has been on an ever-increasing wave of success for almost ten years.  Never heard of them?  Well, it's time to change all that.

I've had the pleasure of knowing the guys for seven years now, and to see their metamorphosis has been nothing short of wonderful.  One reason you've likely never heard of them before is because they started out in their infancy as mostly a Celtic-genre band, playing and growing on the festival circuit (usually ones with the same theme), as well as small pubs and venues here and there.  Though living in Canada, they quickly realized how to capitalize on a few benefits associated with traveling the U.S. by hopping to and from towns in close proximity to each other.  As they traveled more, even to a handful of European gigs along the way, their fan base grew.  Also growing at the same time was their sound.

When the current band member lineup came to be around the year 2000, it brought in a colorful resume of talent.  New members with backgrounds and interests in jazz, latin, celtic, prog rock, classic rock, and traditional Canadian sounds were suddenly melded together, which to many, would seem worthy of an audible antacid.  The happy surprise is that the result is just the opposite.  As the guys describe it, their name has come to be synonymous with their sound: random elements mixed together to form something pleasingly palatable.

With the increase in their popularity, ETH has popped up in great places like The Kennedy Center, the soundtrack for the indie flick 10 MPH (support these flimmakers!), a live concert broadcast on PBS, A&E's Breakfast with the Arts, Live with Regis & Kelly, and most recently, Canada AM, performing The Litter and the Leaves:

Their newest release, Gutter Anthems, is, in my not-so-humble opinion, their most ambitious, unapologetic, and professional compilation yet.  One of my all-time favorite artists is Billy Joel, primarily because of the great storytelling in his lyrics.  ETH has been another all-timer of mine for not only coughing up some of my favorite ballads and crunchy rock tunes, but also for following that same lyrical formula, which they do exceptionally well again on Anthems.  The other aspect that immediately caught my attention on this release is the thorough use of sublime vocal harmonies, for which I am most certainly a sucker.

All that said, it's time to shove some Haggis in your ears and see what I'm spouting off about.  Right now, they are offering up the entire Gutter Anthems CD for a free listen on their website, a very tasty treat, indeed.  If you need more of a free fix to see where they've come from, check out their page on UFO, their record label's website, where you can listen to all four of their most recent releases on the audio player.    Need more linkage?  Find them also on MySpace, Twitter, YouTube, and Facebook.  Then go to their main website, find out when they're playing near you, and get thee to a show.  If there's one thing to be said about ETH, it's that if you like their recorded sound, even just a little bit, their live sound promises to be slap-your-mamma good.

***

As for that side of doughnuts...

ESPN today has been broadcasting their coverage of the local, incredibly fun, Krispy Kreme Challenge that we participated in, as mentioned previously.  The network had their very own Greg Garber pony up to the contest, though he squeaked in just a few minutes shy of the one hour mark.  How he did all of that in a suit and tie, with commentary, and not offer up any road cookies is beyond me.

The GREAT feature narrative clip can be seen HERE.

And this is Greg Garber's personal account:

Have a great week!

The J Project

For quite some time now, I have been hoarding and collecting the letter J.  I have a font & word fetish, especially when it comes to decorating.  I love the use of a random letter here or there, a carefully chosen quotation, or just a single word highlighted in a room.  Based on images I'd seen in the past, I wanted to do something with my surname initial.  It's not the prettiest of all letters, not like the majestic M or the soft + rigid combination of the R, but it is mine, and personalization was the goal here. 

Similar to the idea pictured below, I am going to start kicking this project into high gear.  And by "high gear", I mean finishing it before December 31st when I'd have to chalk it up to another resolution busted.

 

This wonderful photo is from the January 2007 issue of Living etc magazine, a British publication that doesn't look too unlike my now, sadly, defunct Domino.  I came across the photo in a search that led me to the now-bookmarked, eye-candy blog for Oh, Joy! Studio.  This is a great example because of the monochromatic colors that are broken up by the fantastic array of characters.

For my project, keeping it more personalized, of course, it will be all Js, so the beauty (hopefully) will come in the form of their design.  Currently, I have 19 of them, some of which may not make the final display cut.  I am hoping that I can have more found objects in the mix, like old movie marquee letters, or wire letters, or something with an industrial edge, or just something that doesn't look like I decorated a craft store item. 

Until then, I am making the best of it, not to mention that it's a great way to try out new craft techniques with little to no permanent commitment.  Ranging from 4" x 1.5" to 12" x 9", I've got some good canvasses.  My tiny one reminds me of the movie Beetlejuice.  It might be on the re-vamp list, though.  Another so far is the classic gold-atop-red, and one that I decoupaged some tissue paper that had a nice vintagey map illustration. 

Considering each one cost anywhere from a buck to five a piece, over the course of a few years, it's not a bad little project.  I'm hoping to have them grace my entryway wall, spanning it top to bottom.  If anyone has any technique ideas, please share!  I think I'm being a little too picky with the ones I want, which ultimately leads to them sitting in a bag in my craft closet for a few years.  Like they have already.

***

In other news*, today is National Chocolate-Covered Peanuts Day, Quiet Day, Let's All Eat Right Day, and, on this day in 1862, President Lincoln introduced paper currency to the U.S.  So spend your lunch eating healthy and reflecting, then after dinner, go spend some cash at the movies with a box of Goobers.

*Information supplied by one of my new favorite websites, Gone-ta-pott.com.  With their help, I'll hopefully end my blog-topic drought!

Glazed Over

The sugar rushes, upset stomaches, and sore muscles are gone.  So, too, is this year's Krispy Kreme Challenge.

As mentioned earlier, we participated in this year's event, which began in 2004 with a mere 12 friends.  This past Saturday's event included not only over 5,200 participants, both locals and outta-towners, but ESPN coverage, as well.  With temps warming into the low 60s, all was bright in preparation for the Running of the Insane. 

Not only was it shocking to see how many turned out for this event, but the colorful array of entrants certainly added to the atmosphere.  There were a few guys running in just shoes, socks and Speedos (cape optional).  Girls wearing prom dresses.  Costumed superheroes.  A three-legged dog.  A (ex-?)soldier wearing fatigues, combat boots, and a full backpack of who-knows-what.  The guy dressed like Elvis.  Mullet wigs.  A gorilla costume.  Numerous runners wearing inflatable pool innertubes painted like doughnuts around their waist.  Students of Campbell University running with a strapped-on cardboard viking ship around them, five at a time.  Body painting.  And what appeared to be members of the UNC wrestling team... wearing only their too-tight,TMI team leotards.  It all was mildly reminiscent of the costumed gorge-fest of Marathon du Medoc, held in France (on my bucket list, for sure) that I'd learned about not long ago.  They all gathered around the start line, waiting for the tower to chime 9:30am.

  

I started out making an effort, but did not get too far on the whole "running" thing.  A little speed walking was more my style.  Mike was off making a go of it with some of his Footy friends, so we would rendezvous at Krispy Kreme, the halfway point.  Before I arrived, there were already runners making their way back on the second leg, returning to the bell tower and the finish line.  Not everyone was eating the full dozen doughnuts at the half; only those serious enough to be down with the challenge had to shove them all in before returning to the tower within the hour.  It was touch-and-go about whether or not Mike might make a go of the total twelve.  When I got to the Kreme, there were mobs of people gathered at the tiny store.  Some waiting for their boxes, some already stuffing their faces.  There were speed eaters, water-dunkers, pile-smashers.  There were boxes and stray pastries everywhere, amidst the already-forming puke hazards on the pavement.  You could see the anguish on faces drizzled with sweat, though whether the perspiration came from the physical exertion or the glucose overdose was not certain.  I finally spied Mike with one of his friends, he was actually doing it; scarfing down the last of his box.

 

Not everyone had the same fortune...

 

Defeat.

Needless to say, the over-eager beavers that were all in a hurry to run their way to the store were a much different crowd on the way back.  The ratio of runners to walkers did almost a complete 180.  I was still walking myself, but being that I was smart and only had two doughnuts, I was still in relatively good form.  My butt was way too out of shape to deal with anything else that morning besides seeing if my legs would hold up for four miles.  I even passed by Mr. Mullet Man.

 

Finally, everyone made their way back to the tower...

... where they patted themselves on the back, listened to the awards ceremony, and enjoyed some good tunes provided by the Jambulance.

HILARIOUS.

The winner received a doughnut medal.  And five more boxes of doughnuts.

To see some amazing photos captured by the NC State newspaper staff, click HERE!

Their official video is HERE...

And for a cute look at some pre-race footage:

"How To KKC" from Matt at Wolf TV on Vimeo.

Can't wait till next year.  Costumed, perhaps...?